“When all about you is black with gloom,
And all you feel is pending doom.
When your bones are racked with grim despair -
When every breath is a gasp for air.
Keep on going, though you need to grope,
For around the bend is a ray of hope.

A ray of hope is perhaps all that's left,
As your will to live has been bereft.
You've lost it all, it's just no use!
You can end it all, you need no excuse.
But throw away that piece of rope,
And give yourself a chance of hope.

Just give yourself another day,
Brushing aside what your thoughts may say.
This is your life and you can make a new start,
By ignoring the brain - just follow the heart.
Taking baby steps in order to cope,
And minute by minute you'll build on your hope.

Build on your hope,. one day at a time,
Though the road be steep and hard to climb.
The hurts of the past - they should be dead.
The fears of the future are all in your head.
Just live in the present and refuse to mope
Your life will sparkle for you're living in hope.”

-Hope by Brian Quinn-

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“Kill the king!!”

The very line that has made me ‘known’ in hall. Now, whenever someone passes me, they would mimic my lines and one cannot help but be tickled by the way they say it. Let’s just say, the way I said it was a tad more special. Hehe!! This could well be the reason why people like that line so much. Even people in pharmacy are constantly asking me to repeat that line. =.=

Sadly? Finally? The musical is over. Can’t help but feel lost without rehearsals and such. It’s like a post production syndrome or something. The happiest line I heard from my parents were, “$18 is a bit cheap for a show like that!” Whoah!! I never knew my parents could contribute positive comments in the most indirect way ever. Haha. They never said anything about me though.. =[ Never mind. I still agree that it was the leads that were good and they were the ones who made this musical the success it already is!

Before our last day of performance, someone said, “This is probably the last time some of you will be on stage. Give it all you’ve got! Remember those 8 weeks you’ve spent rehearsing in the dance studio. Those late nights you guys endured. You guys cried together, laughed together and worked hard together. Do not let the other teams down. Marketing, fund-raising, publicity, costumes, sets… They worked hard for this night to be a success, and now, it all comes down to you guys. You guys will showcase what everyone else has been working hard for. After tonight, it will be over.”

I loved the musical. I loved everything in it. The sets, the costumes, the fund-raising activities, the posters.. The programme booklet was a little disappointing (with its many spelling mistakes), but great nevertheless. Everyone did a wonderful job!! Sets looked brilliant! They did a great job even though they could not watch the show and had to endure hours of rehearsals with us. Costumes were the same!! Helping us with our make-up, helping with our changing of costumes in between scenes, and giving us ganbattes back stage!! Especially my costumer!! Ever so efficient since I have to change quite hurriedly for act II.

The director said he cried in nearly every scene on the 2nd day of our performance. On that day, he watched the performance from the audience’s perspective. It’s like finally seeing your very own creation. You’ve trained them for 8 whole weeks nearly every day, perfecting their every move, nurturing whatever little bit of talent they have within them, and now, you see them blossom on stage, bringing your idea, your play to life on stage for all to behold. He said that everything was perfect. Just so perfect. We did not know what to say then. Speechless with joy? I don’t know. Everyone just looked at each other and we had this unspoken consensus amongst ourselves. It’s like we knew what everyone was thinking of and saying out loud has been deemed unnecessary. It was a feeling that cannot be penned in words.

Amazing isn’t it? There are so many billions, zillions of words out there, but yet when it comes to something so simple, words fail us. Is it the words that fail us or our brains?

School work? I think there isn’t hope left, but nevermind, I shall be the miracle of miracles? Haiz, I really do not want to delude myself, but I think having that little glimpse of hope is better than none. I think my parents will kill me. Maybe the next time you visit me, I’ll already be six feet under. Haiz.

Anyhow, best of luck to everyone taking O levels and A levels!! This is the last leg, so give it all you’ve got!

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“When I look into these eyes
I find things no one else ever catches a glimpse at

I see this fear of judgment
that makes her cower at confrontation

I see this hopelessness for the future
that make her choices her burden alone

I see this desperate need for companionship to make her strong
in the savage world of humans

I see this courage
caged in her thoughts of inferiority

I see these thoughts of abandonment
that make her cling to anything

I see this devotion to her beliefs
that makes her fear death

And I hate that the person I always see is me.”

-I see me by Jay-