"For I shall learn from flower and leaf
That colour every drop they hold,
To change the lifeless wine of grief
To living gold."

-Sara Teasdale-

---------------

Digging into the past..

He slapped me.
I ran to my room.
I wept.
I buried myself into a book,
and I wept futher.
The grass seemed greener,
on the other side.

He left me.
I ran to my room.
I sobbed.
I lost myself in a world of fantasy,
and I sobbed even harder.
There are some things
that are not meant to be.

He smiled at me.
I rejoiced inside.
But I ran to my room.
I cried.
I indulged into the written,
and I cried even more.
Some things will forever be
beyond my reach.

Fairy tales are just that, fairy tales.
They only live in fairyland.

----------------

"你们要吃饭吗?"

She jerked from her hunched position and nearly cried out in shock.

"Er.. er.." she stammered, unsure of what to say. She glanced at the uncle furtively, then back at her friend who was seated next to her. She, too, was staring blankly at the uncle, dumbfounded.

"不,不, 我们稍等一下才吃," she answered, as she frantically tried to think up disparate excuses to fend the uncle off.

The uncle frowned and seemed not to get what she just said.

"你们要吃饭吗?" he repeated, leaning with one hand on the table in front of her.

She recoiled and leaned against her chair, wondering what eactly the uncle was up to.

"Er.." she began, wondering if she should just repeat what she just said. Feeling a little stupid, she reiterated what she just said. This time, a little louder.

Finally, her sentence was drilled into his head, and he left, ambling back to his seat down the row.

Quickly, she turned to her friend and just looked at her friend, flabbergasted. They stared at each other for a long time, as though suffering from shock. She blinked. The uncle was seriously freaking her out. Just yesterday, the uncle had asked her along for dinner. Thankfully, she had the sense to reject his offer.

"Clara, I think you are too friendly towards him," her friend began.

"But aren't we taught to be friendly to people?" she interupted before her friend could carry on.

"Yes, Clara, but not to a paedophile!!" her friend said, jabbing the word 'paedophile' she had written on the paper with all her might, as though that might actually get rid of the uncle.

She fell silent and contemplated over what her friend had just said.

"No no.. I wasn't THAT nice to him. All I did was smile at him! I mean, isn't that the normal thing to do?" she retorted, stubbornly refusing to acknowledge the fact that being nice was the root of the whole problem.

"CLA-RA!" her friend said with a tint of resignation. Her friend shook her head and went back to her work leaving her to brood over the idea of friendliness. Exactly how nice is nice?

Half an hour later, 'I'm hungry,' was written on the slip of paper that was placed in front of her.

'i'm hungry too, but I'm scared of the uncle. What if he follows us?' she wrote back.

'He's looking at this direction!!' came the reply.

'Can we leave when he's not looking at us?' she scribbled at the side.

'Okay, but he is ALWAYS looking here.'

10 minutes later, they were still trying to evade the pair of eyes that gawked at them like those of a hawk.

'I'm hungry!!' wrote her friend.

'I know. Is he still looking?' was the scrawled reply from her.

'Yes.'

Suddenly, her friend nudged her and motioned for her to go.

'Quick, quick,' her friend mouthed and tugged at her sleeve.

Together, they tiptoed out of their seats and practically flew down the stairs.

"I need to go to the toilet," said her friend and they went into the toilet.

After a few minutes, her friend was done.

"What if he's waiting for us outside?" she asked her friend.

Slowly, they inched the toilet door open and peered outside. They were behaving as though they have commited a dreadful crime which was really laughable. Anyone who kept an eye on them would be in tears as they looked on, seeing them scamper out of the library as though a monster was hot on their tail.

Phew! was her first thought as they emerged from the library.

"Continue walking! 此地不能久留!"

At last, they were going to feed their famished stomachs.

--------------

AHHHH.. I think I went berserk last night. And I have no idea why.
All of a sudden, I started talking to nearly everyone on my contact list! O.O
My friend kept laughing at my nick though, and I still can't phantom why I did what I did last night. Oops.

I know!! It must be you!! YOU!! It's because I never write to you as often as I would! Is that it? You kept my sanity during the prelims and now I'm seriously losing it!! Wahahahaha.. Oops. Better stop that before I have to take the papers in an Asylum.

Okay. I've got to rush off now. Going to the library alone today!! Sobs sobs. Alright, smile and be happy!! Remember, Lollipops are sweet, and so are you, you, and YOU!! Whoot!! Toodles! Till the next time!!

---------------

This may be my last entry before the As.
I may not write again during my As,
but at least I am kind enough to give advance notice,
Unlike...

Nevermind, let's not sidetrack, shall we?
Anyhow, I may write, and I may not.
I do not know.
Even if I do write, it prognosticates bad news.

To end off (and no, I'm not going to die),
Best of luck to all As, Os, Uni students (especially NTU students i think).
Remember, the best is yet to be.
(Gosh, AC motto.)

---------------

2 more days to the crunch.
Brace yourself!

---------------

"Now, here, you see,
it takes all the running you can do,
to keep in the same place.
If you want to get somewhere else,
you must run at least twice as fast as that!"

-Lewis Carroll-