"..to love another person is to see the face of God."

-Les Miserables-

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Dear Father,

Why is it so hard to love You?
Why is it so hard to just believe in You?
Is it wrong to just have faith in You?
Am I wrong to do things my way?

Father, tell me why!

Amen.

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I miss concert!
Oh man.

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Why am I always confused?
It's true that thoughts control your emotions, but I feel that my emotions are controlling my thoughts!!

Logically speaking, it should be thoughts which chains your emotions, but emotions cannot be controlled! Rather, thoughts can!!

How do I eradicate these thoughts?!
How do I suppress such thoughts?!
How do I curb such strong emotions that threaten my very existence?!
How do I acheive the emotion I want?

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Do I do things to make people happy at the expense of my satisfaction?
But, what of the "I told you so" repurcussion?
Am I to stop doing something because of the constant discouragement?

Even if I were to go ahead, how am I to survive with constant reminders of "I told you so" or discouragements?
How am I to carry on if I know that I am not supported?

I am so scared.

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"Just let it end."